Depending on a number of factors, on any given day I will find myself obsessing over some body part in a most unconstructive way. You guys know what I’m talking about. I’ll stand in front of the mirror and poke at the fupa, turn to the side and cringe at the saddle bags, wave my arms around to watch the upper arm jiggle. I spend a lot of time engaging in this behavior, which got me to thinking…why the hell do I do that?

The crap I say to myself I would never say to anyone else, it does little to motivate me to change the “problem areas” and it sure as shit doesn’t make me feel too good. My body image issues may not be serious enough to make me sick, but I feel like I gotta stop this nonsense. I’ve come up with a few ideas to help me develop a more realistic body image:

• Make a cartoon drawing of myself as I see myself on my worst day and share it with my girlfriends. I know this sounds nutz, but hear me out. When I was in grad school one of my best friends and I had a conversation about the body parts we hate. As I listened to her describe her “moon face” I thought how funny it would be to actually draw out our bad body images and share them with each other. You see, I never thought of her as having a moon face, in fact I find her quite lovely. We said we would do it one day, but we never did. I’m totally going to force my friends to do this with me, just to prove how ridiculous our body obsessions are. It may require a few bottles of wine, but be forewarned, I’m coming after you with crayons in hand…you know who you are…
• For every insult I hurl at the mirror, I will also force out one compliment. This one is a little easier. Take the picture above, for example. My biggest complaints are the fupa and jiggly thighs, but dang I got some great cleavage and a super-cute booty. This little exercise is my way of finding some positive motivation within to get my butt to the yoga studio or to give me the will power to stick to my healthy diet.
• When I find myself being overly critical, I will think of one small thing I can do that day to “fix” the “problem”. Tacking on a few extra sit-ups (fupa), taking the stairs instead of the elevator (saddle bags) and avoiding the M&M jar (all of it) are examples a small things I can do that may or may not “fix” the “problem”. At least I’ll feel like I’m doing something about it.

Do you think any of these ideas would work for you? Better yet, will you share your ridiculous body image drawings with me? I can always use a good laugh

How cute is this? Xueexueg drew the asanas he can do!

Less than a year ago I started practicing Ashtanga Yoga, and I was hooked. I’m not being dramatic when I say that Ashtanga changed my life. My stress levels went way down, it gave me something to be totally intense about, and my body hadn’t looked that hot in years. I was happily practicing 3-4 times a week for several months when the pain started in my left elbow. I complained about it for a few weeks. It got to the point that it ached all day and was making it difficult to do simple things like type and steer my car.

At the prodding of my boyfriend, who is much health nuttier than me, I went to a physical therapist to get a diagnosis. After some X-rays and a few questions the doctor diagnosed me with epicondylitis, or tennis elbow. I said “Funny, ‘cuz I’ve never played tennis, wocka wocka wocka!” I wasn’t laughing, though, when he told me that I had to stay off the elbow for six weeks. I was crushed. I’d made some breakthroughs in my practice recently, I was on a roll. I knew that taking six weeks off would be like starting over. I went home and cried, out of frustration, anger and sadness.

I went about three weeks without going to class when I finally said to myself “This is bullshit”. So I went back. Stupid, stupid, stupid! Not only did my elbow get worse, but I injured my back and neck to the point that I couldn’t turn my head. I felt like a jackass, and I was totally defeated. I think I went back one more time before just giving up.

Over the next three months I ran through the range of emotions associated with loss: anger, sorrow, acceptance. I reached the point where I was telling myself that my body is just not meant for Ashtanga, that maybe I can do it sporadically but I’ll never go back to 3-4 days a week. Deep inside my head and heart, I could hear a voice saying “Quitter! Excuses are like farts, everyone makes them and they all stink!” Lately I’ve been trying to find a routine that could replace Ashtanga, but nothing has stuck. To boot, I’m getting fat. Boo-hoo, I’m riding this pity train to Fattyville and I’m taking you with me!

But wait! Last night I had the good fortune to meet a hilarious and genuine lady, Liz Bick. She’s visiting for a while from England and has been practicing Ashtanga for 3 years. I soon found out that when she used to live here she went to my old studio,  and has been going since she’s been back. It took some persuasion, but she talked me in to going to class this morning. I was excited about the idea and promised her she would see me in the morning.

Considering that I had about two drinks too many last night, I am amazed I made it to class. If I hadn’t promised to show up I probably would have stayed in bed another hour. Thanks, Liz, for motivating me! I got through about half my regular practice when I decided to stop in the interest of being able to walk out of the studio. Ashtanga is no punk, it WILL kick your ass. As I was lying in my final resting pose I felt a sense of accomplishment and contentment. I decided there that I would start going back to class, slowly at first and with my focus on protecting my elbow. You see, I think I have been hyper-extending in a few of my poses. If I really concentrate I can teach myself to break that bad habit. Instead of focusing on progressing in my practice I’ll have to pay attention to not hurting myself. It’s not as exciting, but I don’t care. I’m just so glad to be back that I’ll take it.

That three months of psychological yoga jail I put myself in has taught me a lot. I was being stubborn and impatient, trying to maintain my focus on pushing forward in my practice when I should have placed my intent on breaking the bad habits I’d fallen into. As our bodies change through exercise, I guess our intentions have to follow suit. And just like any other pursuit, I think it’s reasonable to step back and reassess our fitness goals from time to time. For me, that meant changing my way of thinking about yoga, at least for now.

This won't be my goal, not for a VERY long time

Photo Credits xueexueg, virginiazuluaga, and milopeng

I started jumping rope and using resistance bands the past two weeks in preparation for all the traveling I’m doing this summer. Check out my gear:

I know this will fit in your suitcase

That’s a light resistance band, a jump rope with a built-in counter, and medium resistance band. All three weigh less than a pound total and I can fit them easily into the front pocket of my carry-on roller bag. I’ve been working on a routine where I start off jumping rope for a minute, then I do three sets of resistance training, another round of jumping rope, another 3 sets of resistance exercises and so on. I repeat the intervals until I’ve gotten to each major muscle group (legs, biceps/triceps, back, chest, shoulders). I finish off with 150 crunches in five different flavors (30 reps of each). This routine takes me about 40 minutes to complete.

With so many distractions in Chicago, it will be difficult to stay on my routine. I’m gonna try my best and let you know how I fare. Wish me luck!

Invest your bling in your health savings

I don’t mean to be all Debbie Downer. What I want to say in this post is that, given the odds of finding a cure, to me it makes a lot of sense to try my best to avoid cancer altogether. I know it’s not a sure bet, but living a healthy lifestyle is the best way to do it. I got to thinking: Why don’t I approach my health like I do my retirement fund? I sock away a portion of my paycheck every month in the hopes that there will be enough to support me when I decide to quit working for good. What if for every vegetable I eat, for every glass of water I drink instead of a soda, for every minute of exercise I endure, I think of it as dropping a few bucks into a health fund? It’s the same principle: take an action today that is intended to pay off in the future. With a health fund, I am “investing” in my golden years, in the quality of life I want to have. When I retire, I want to travel the world and volunteer and garden and write a novel…I better start aggressively investing in MY health fund if I’m going to do all of that.

Photo credit Brooks Elliott

I will give you tips like this lady would give you grape tomatoes

Yowza. It’s been close to three months since I last posted, but it’s not because I haven’t been thinking about this blog. I have decided to take the blog in a new direction, which would be a massive improvement over the directionless meandering that it has become.

Here’s the idea: I know a lot about nutrition and healthy lifestyles, and I’m passionate about disease prevention. I’ve accumulated mounds of information from working in the medical field and in academia. From my own reading, trial and error, and self-experimentation I’ve logged years of experience in staying fit despite obstacles that would prevent me from doing so. I am also famously cheap, having lived on approximately $20,000 a year for the majority of my adult life. Lastly, as anyone who knows me can attest, I lead a busy lifestyle that necessitates frequent travel.

And this is great news for you! Hence forth, I will make proclamations in archaic English. Also, I’m going to blog my experiences and tips on how to be healthy for little money and less time commitment. Expect to see recipes, tips on exercising, and general buffoonery as I sample products and perform more self-experiments.

Note that my goal is not to attain health perfection, but to find ways to prioritize healthy living into tight schedules and budgets. I’m sure I will run into snafus along the way. I plan to brutally honest and hope that you will laugh with me as I figure out how to do this. Probably eating goldfish crackers for dinner, as I admittedly did this evening, is not the most auspicious way to begin this new endeavor, but I guess there’s no time like the present.

For my first experiment, I will attempt to get at least 7.5 hours of sleep each night this week. Crap, I better get started. Expect an update towards the end of the week.

Nighty night!

Photo credit: Pink Sherbet Photography (D Sharon Pruitt)